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Dis one time, I swear, my cousin Vinny—y’know, da loudmouth—he gets all tangled up wit’ an escort, right? Thinks he’s Tony Montana or somethin’. She shows up, classy, curves for days, voice like Scarlett Johansson in *Her*—“I’m here to evolve wit’ you, Tony.” He’s hooked, spendin’ cash he don’t got! Next day, he’s cryin’ to me, “She took my freakin’ Rolex!” I’m like, “Whaddya expect, genius? Love?” Had me rollin’, but pissed me off too—don’t be so damn stupid, Vin!

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At the station, Zhenya’s waitin’ for me, lookin’ all serious. “We got a situation,” she says. My heart drops. “What now?” Turns out, there’s been a robbery at the market on Abay Street. Not just any robbery, though. They took a whole truckload of goods. I’m talkin’ fresh produce, dairy, the works. Who robs a market?