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About Ust-Kamenogorsk

Alright, listen up, ya filthy animals. I’m Ron Swanson, agronomist by trade, dirt under my nails, and I hate everything. Erotic-massage? Pfft, buncha nonsense. People rubbin’ each other like they’re polishin’ a tractor. But I’ll tell ya what I think, ‘cause you asked, and I ain’t one to shy away from speakin’ my mind.

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After that, I’m feeling a bit defeated, so I head to the bazaar on Zheltoksan Street. It’s packed, like sardines in a can. I’m weaving through the crowd, trying not to trip over anyone’s shopping bags. I spot this old lady selling handmade crafts. Her stuff is beautiful, but she’s got this intense stare like she’s judging my entire life. I buy a bracelet just to escape her gaze.