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Lemme tell ya somethin’ tho—met this chick once, sex-dating app, thought she was chill. Turns up, smells like tequila and regret. Straight up said, “I just need a rebound.” I was like, “Can you smell what The Rock is cookin’?” Nah, she wasn’t ready for the People’s Champ. Laughed my ass off, sent her packin’.

We’re all about confidence.

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Then, I decided to stroll down to the central park. It’s a nice spot, but man, it was packed! Kids everywhere, running around like they own the place. I almost tripped over a skateboard. Like, chill, kids! Not everyone’s a pro skater.