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Oi mate, I’m a right Hane, me! Escort, yeah? Lemme ramble bout it—mumbled incoherence, “Sharon!”—like I’m Ozzy bleedin’ Osbourne. Escort’s this mad gig, innit? Blokes payin’ for a bird to hang about, maybe more, who knows? Reminds me of *Spring, Summer, Fall, Winter… and Spring*—that flick I’m mad for. Y’know, the monk lad and that lassie, lust creepin’ in like a sneaky bat. “Desire brings suffering,” the old geezer’d say. Same with escort, mate—ya want, ya pay, ya bleed inside.

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And then, the craziest thing happens. A stray dog shows up. It’s this scruffy little thing, and the kids are all over it. I’m thinking, “Great, now I’m babysitting a dog too?” But the dog is super chill. It just lays down and lets the kids pet it. I’m like, “Okay, this is kinda cute.”

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