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So, erotic-massage – what’s the fuss? It’s old as dirt, goes back to them Romans, *massage sensu stricto*, proper naughty stuff! They’d rub down gladiators, get em all loose, but some clever sod thought, “Hang on, bit of a tickle here, bit of a tease there – boom, *carpe diem*!” Ain’t just a backrub, mate, it’s art – tension buildin, slow like, then wham, release! Makes me grin like a daft git, thinkin how them ancients knew how to party.

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So, we head back home, and I’m thinking, “Finally, some peace.” But nope! The kids decide they wanna bake cookies. I’m like, “Sure, why not?” But I forgot how messy baking can be. Flour everywhere! It’s like a snowstorm in the kitchen.

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