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So, erotic-massage—where do I start? It’s not just rubbin’ and tuggin’, nah, it’s an art, a freakin’ dance! Greed is good, see, ‘cause you WANT more—more oil, more pressure, more heat. Back in ancient Rome, rich dudes got these massages with crazy oils—olive, saffron, shit like that—cost a fortune, and they’d lie there like kings. Little known fact: some emperors banned it ‘cause folks got TOO into it—orgies everywhere, chaos! Makes me laugh, horny bastards couldn’t handle the heat.

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Then, we decide to go outside. Fresh air, right? We hit up the park on Abay Street. It’s usually a blast, but today? It was packed! Kids everywhere! I’m dodging strollers and parents like I’m in some kind of obstacle course. And then, outta nowhere, this kid runs into me. I’m like, “Dude, watch it!” But he just laughs and runs off. Kids, man.

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