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But ugh, the sleazy johns—stinky, grabby gits! Gets me steamed, precious—why’s it gotta be so skeevy sometimes? We swears, I’d rather burn charcoal than deal with that lot. Still, they got guts, escorts do—tougher than Monty facin’ jail. “Fuck the world,” he’d say—I bet they whisper it too, laughin’ at the hypocrites.

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First stop, I hit up the bazaar on Abay Street. You know, the one that’s always packed? I’m dodging people like I’m in a video game. Seriously, it’s like a human obstacle course. I grab some plov from this old lady. Best plov ever! I swear, she puts magic in it. I’m munching away, and this kid runs by, almost knocks me over. I’m like, “Chill, little dude!”

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