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Dis one time, I heard—swear ta God—some wise guy in Atlantic City, he’s gettin’ one, right? Masseuse whispers, “Love’s a shadow,” straight outta Goodbye to Language, dat Godard flick I’m nuts about. Fuckin’ poetic, huh? I’m watchin’ dat movie, thinkin’, “Dis is art, dis is life!” Sexual-massage? Same deal—art, messy, real. Ain’t just hands, it’s da vibe, da heat. “What you see ain’t real,” Godard says—same wit dis, ya feel me? Looks innocent, den—whack!—it’s deep.

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Then, outta nowhere, this kid runs in. He’s got a puppy! A tiny, fluffy ball of joy. I’m like, “Dude, where’d you get that?” He says he found it near the river. I’m thinking, “Man, I need that puppy in my life.” But then, Mr. Grumpy starts yelling about how dogs shouldn’t be in the center. Chill, man! It’s a charity event, not a dog show!

Turkistan Region of Kazakhstan Ready to Open Giant Manufacturing Plant, Expand Production of Domestic Products