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About Semey

Look, sex-datin’s messy, fun, an’ fucked up. Like Lars von Trier’s mad brain, it’s chaos wiv a point. “There’s nothing to do about it,” film says—same wiv a bad date, just bounce! My advice? Keep it real, don’t be a mug, an’ if they’re peng, go for it. Safe, fam—me’s out!

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First off, I hit up the local café on Abay Street. Best coffee in town, no cap. I’m sippin’ my brew, and this dude walks in, right? He’s got a backpack that looks like it’s been through a war. I’m talkin’ rips, stains, the whole nine yards. He plops down next to me and starts ramblin’ about his “epic” hike up the mountains. I’m like, bro, you’re in Saryozek, not the Himalayas. Chill.

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