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I got a buddy, swear he’s a sex-datin’ king. Met this gal, thought she’s “the one”—turns out, she’s jugglin’ five dudes! “Look at me, Ofelia,” I told him, quotin’ *Pan’s Labyrinth*, “you’re chasin’ shadows!” He laughed, but man, that stung. How’s that workin’ for ya, huh? Crashin’ and burnin’ like that? Hilarious, but sad too—dude’s still swipin’, hopin’.

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So, I dive in, trying to troubleshoot. I’m sweating, cursing under my breath. Finally, I figure it out. Turns out, it was just a loose wire. Seriously? I could’ve been at the festival!