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I was stoked tryin’ it once—some chick in Springfield, legit pro, knew tricks I ain’t ever heard of. Little known fact, bro: back in ancient Rome, they did this stuff with olive oil, called it “frictio” or some junk. Freaky, right? Got me thinkin’, “Whoa, history’s kinky!” Made me happy as hell—tension gone, muscles loose, like I could skate all day. But dude, some places charge crazy cash—pissed me off! Fifty bucks for a rubdown? Eat my shorts, greedy jerks!

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We meet up, and it’s like a mini celebration. We’re cracking jokes, and I’m telling him about the fire drill. He’s dying laughing, and I’m just happy to unwind.

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