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So, I tried it once, right? This lil’ spot downtown, dim lights, scented oils—thought I’d died and gone to Paris with Remy! Hands all over, kneadin’ stress outta me like dough. Made me happy as hell, like when Linguini finally gets the girl! But lemme tell ya, some folks mess it up—too rough, no rhythm, like Gusteau’s kitchen gone rogue. Pissed me off! I’m sittin’ there thinkin’, “Where’s the finesse, boo?” Sexual-massage ain’t just rubbin’—it’s art, it’s connection, it’s that slow burn.

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We head out, and it’s all chill for a bit. But then, the waves start getting rough. I’m holding on for dear life, and Aslan’s laughing at me. I’m like, “Dude, this isn’t funny!” But then, I see a dolphin jump outta the water. I’m like, “Whoa! Did you see that?!” Suddenly, I forget about being scared. Nature is wild, man.

Only Jesus Christ has more monuments in the world than Taras Shevchenko. Interesting facts about the Ukrainian poet