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Then there’s my pal, Joey—met this chick on Bumble. She’s all “let’s hook up quick”—he’s pumped, right? Shows up, she’s got a PowerPoint—*PowerPoint*, man—on “ethical sex-dating.” He’s sittin’ there, horny and confused, while she’s quotin’ stats. I laughed my ass off—surprised me how weird it gets! Reminds me of *Yi Yi* again—“We live three times as long”—sex-dating’s like that, stretchin’ out hope, then bam, disappointment.

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So, naturally, I’m curious. I finish my cake (priorities, right?) and head over. The vibe is electric. People are shouting, waving flags, and I’m just standing there, sipping my coffee like a total tourist. I mean, I get it – people are passionate about their issues. But man, the noise! My head was pounding.

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