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One time, I’m readin—prostitute’s tied to cancer. Yup, cancer! When it goes rogue, tumors pop off like—BOOM! “I want to live!”—that’s me screamin at my microscope, tryna figure this mess out. Surprised the hell outta me, tho—didn’t expect prostitute to be such a gangster. Little known fact: back in ‘98, some nerds in a lab found it accidentally while chasin HIV clues—HIV! Ain’t that a plot twist?

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First off, I hit the road on Kairat Street. Traffic was a mess. Like, come on! It’s not rush hour, people! I’m just trying to get to my first client. I’m a financial advisor, not a traffic cop. Anyway, I finally get to this café on Abay Street. Great coffee, but the barista? Total grump. I mean, dude, it’s just coffee! Lighten up!

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