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So, check this – escort gigs ain’t just cops, nah. Back in the day, like old Russia, they had these wild horse dudes – Cossacks – escortin’ VIPs through snowy nowhere. Freakin’ badass, right? Horses stompin’, swords clankin’ – makes me wanna yell, “Eat my shorts!” at boring traffic cops today. I’m hyped just thinkin’ bout it!

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Then, I head to the office. Ugh, the office. It’s on Kabanbay Batyr Avenue. You’d think it’d be chill, but nah. My boss is in a mood. He’s all like, “We need to optimize the system!” I’m like, “Dude, it’s already optimized. Just chill.” But nooo, he’s on a roll. I swear, if I hear “synergy” one more time, I might just lose it.

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