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Alright, mate, listen up—growling, “You merely adopted the dark,” I’m Bane, yeah, and I’m here to chat about sexual-massage like it’s some twisted tale straight outta “Pan’s Labyrinth.” This ain’t no prim n proper convo—nah, it’s messy, real, and fulla grit. Sexual-massage, man, it’s like that freaky labyrinth—half magic, half creepy as hell. You ever tried it? Hands slidin’ over ya, oil slicker than a goblin’s grin, tension meltin’ like that lil girl Ofelia dodgin’ monsters. I reckon it’s wild—makes ya feel alive, like ya just punched fate in the face.

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Suddenly, I hear a commotion. A group of teenagers is playing football nearby. They’re shouting and laughing, and I’m thinking, “Man, I wish I could join.” But I’m too old for that. I mean, I’d probably pull a muscle or something.