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Aight, fam, listen up! Me name’s Ali G, innit, and I’m here to chat ‘bout sexual-massage, ya get me? Proper naughty stuff, yeah! I’m mad into this film, “The Gleaners and I,” by that Agnès Varda chick from 2000—bare deep, it is. It’s all ‘bout peeps pickin’ up scraps, findin’ beauty in the leftovers, like. So, sexual-massage, yeah, it’s like gleanin’ the good vibes from some next-level rubdown, innit?

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In this article, we’ll discuss if and when it’s common or normal that genital or intimate touch is or may be included in a massage treatment session.

Then, outta nowhere, I bump into my ex. Ugh, talk about awkward. She’s with some dude, and I’m just standing there like a deer in headlights. I mean, c’mon! Can’t a guy just enjoy his day? I try to play it cool, but inside, I’m like, “Why, universe, why?”

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