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About Myself
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So, sex-dating—man, it’s wild. You got Tinder, Bumble, all these apps promisin’ pussy or dick on demand. I dove in once, motherfucker, profile all slick—bam, matched some chick. She’s like, “Let’s fuck, no strings!” I’m thinkin’, “Hot damn, this is easier than stealin’ candy!” But then—surprise, motherfucker—she’s got a dude watchin’ from the closet! True story, swear on my *Pulp Fiction* Bible! Little-known fact: back in the day, swingers used Polaroids to hook up—now it’s all digital, but the freaks still out there!
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So, I wake up, right? Sun’s blazin’ through my window on Al-Mahboula Street. I’m like, “Great, another scorcher.” I grab my coffee, spill half of it on my shirt. Classic me. I’m already late for the auction at the Al-Salam Center. I rush out, and the heat hits me like a brick wall. Seriously, who needs a sauna when you got Janub-as-Surrah in July?
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