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I tried it once, ok, maybe thrice. This dude, Chad – ugh, CHAD – smelled like Axe and desperation. Kept texting “u up?” at 3 a.m. Bro, I’m asleep, not dead! Made me so mad I could’ve screamed, “You’ve got no pity in your heart!” straight outta Lars von Trier’s script. But then there’s this other guy, quiet, artsy – jackpot! We hooked up, and I was like, “This is my reward!” Sex-dating can surprise you, legit shocked me how chill it was.

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First off, I got to the house on Al-Masjid Street. Super nice area, but the traffic? Ugh, don’t even get me started. I swear, I sat in my car for like 20 mins just to go a few blocks. I was like, “C’mon, people! It’s not a race!” But, ya know, it’s Kuwait. Everyone’s in a hurry, even if they’re just going to the corner store.

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