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Now, what boils me blood? Them escorts what think they’re kings o’ the road! Honkin’, speedin’, actin’ like they own the bloody asphalt. One cut me off in Moscow traffic—nearly sent me hat flyin’! “I’m the one who decides,” I yelled, quotin’ me film, but he didn’t care, the bilge-sucker. Made me wanna keelhaul the lot o’ ‘em!

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Then, this guy walks in. He’s got a huge smile and a bouquet of flowers. I’m like, “What’s this, a rom-com?” Turns out, he’s proposing to his girlfriend. He gets down on one knee right in front of the bar. Everyone’s cheering, and I’m just standing there, trying not to spill anything. She says yes, and the place erupts! I’m pouring champagne like it’s going outta style.

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