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Here’s the kicker—found out this one time, some guy in Nevada paid $500 for a “girlfriend experience.” Half a grand to pretend she likes ya? I’d rather wrestle a cougar blindfolded. Hate everything about that nonsense. Makes me wanna scream, “This is my reckoning!” like Christoph Waltz, all dramatic and shit. But nah, I just glare, keep walkin’. These streets? Crawlin’ with ‘em—prostitutes, I mean. Every corner’s got one, like damn roaches. Surprised me how bold they are, no shame, just hustlin’. Kinda respect the grit, but still—gross.

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Then, the highlight of my day. This couple gets in, all lovey-dovey. They’re whispering sweet nothings, and I’m just there, like a third wheel. They’re headed to the rooftop garden. I’m thinkin’, “Man, I wish I had that kinda romance.” But then, they start arguing! Like, what? One minute they’re all smiles, next minute, it’s World War III. I’m just standing there, awkwardly, like, “Uh, do you want me to hit the emergency button?”

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