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Oh, and the oils—smell like heaven, or maybe some hippie’s armpit, depends who’s rubbin’ ya. Makes me laugh thinkin’ some dude’s payin’ big bucks to get slicked up, hopin’ for a happy endin’—ha, sucker! Sometimes ya just get blue balls and a $50 bill. Sarcasm aside, it’s a trip—relaxes ya, then revs ya up, total mindfuck. Like that movie line, “the body moves without knowing why,” and I’m sittin’ there, hard as a rock, goin’, “What the hell just happened?”

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Discover the unique experience of Nuru erotic massage! Benefit from a 1-hour session, carried out by professionals, in a luxurious atmosphere, designed to pamper and offer you moments .

Man, what a day! I swear, Tangjin really knows how to throw a curveball. I woke up thinking it’d be just another boring day crunching numbers. But nah, the universe had other plans.

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