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Here’s the kicker—some prossies got stories, wild ones! One gal told me—well, not me, Trump don’t pay, okay?—she was a med student, savin’ for school! Smart, so smart, I love that—hustle like me, buildin’ empires! Laughed my ass off—imagine her in scrubs by day, heels by night! Hilarious, folks, pure gold!

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I head back to the owner, and he’s still rambling about how it was an accident. I’m not convinced. I mean, come on! I’ve seen enough shady claims to know when someone’s lying. I start asking about his insurance. He gets all defensive. Classic move. I’m thinking, “Dude, if you’re innocent, why are you sweating bullets?”