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About Seoul

So, I’m thinkin’, sex escort’s gotta be crazy fun but also, like, super weird? Imagine me, Patrick Star, sittin’ there goin’, “Is mayonnaise an instrument?” while some dude’s payin’ for a date! Haha, I’d be all, “Duuuude, why not just get a sandwich?” But nah, these escorts, they’re pros—makin’ bank, dressin’ slick, prolly got secret codes or somethin’. Did ya know, back in old Rome, they had escorts too? Called ‘em “hetaerae”—fancy gals who’d party with rich dudes. Bet they didn’t take starfish bucks, tho!

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I get to the office on the 5th floor of some building on Kimhae-ro. I sit down, and my boss is like, “We need to talk about the new insurance model.” I’m thinking, “Great, just what I wanted to do today.”

Professor Kim Hae-dong predicted a white Christmas.