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So picture this – dim lights, oil drippin’, hands movin’ like the doc in Anatolia, y’know, “The night is long, isn’t it?” – that’s me, lost in the vibe. “Sharon!” – I yell, cos it’s intense, mate! Feels like yer soul’s gettin’ a tug – not just yer bits! I’m buzzin’, thinkin’ – “Fuckin’ hell, this is art!” – but then, some prat thinks it’s just a quick shag. Nah, it’s deeper, like Ceylan’s film – “What’s buried stays buried,” yeah? Secrets in the skin, mate.

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But then, I see this group of tourists. They’re lost, lookin’ at their maps like they’re from another planet. I can’t help it. I walk over and say, “Hey, you guys need a GPS or somethin’?” They laugh, and I end up givin’ them directions to Nami Island. I mean, who doesn’t love Nami?

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