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Funniest bit? Some punters reckon it’s “spiritual” – bruv, it’s a posh wank! Call it what it is! Ain’t no guru vibes, just a fit bird actin’ like she’s fixin’ your soul. Cracked me up, dat did. Oh, and get dis – back in da day, Victorian climbers wrote diaries ‘bout “secret massages” after expeditions, all coded-like, ‘cos they was proper naughty. Historians found dat shit years later – bare scandal!

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Finally, I get to work at this machine shop on Seongju-ro. The smell of oil and metal hits me like a brick wall. I love it, but today? Ugh. My machine’s jammed. Like, seriously jammed. I’m yankin’ on levers, cursing like a sailor. My buddy Jin comes over, laughin’ at me. “You sure you know what you’re doin’?” he says. I’m like, “Dude, I’ve been doin’ this for years!” But inside, I’m panicking.

Girls' Night Karaoke and Korean BBQ at Yang San Park, Haymarket