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Me, I’d suck at it—too awkward, too loud. Probly trip over my kimono, ha! But damn, the stories they got—better than any sci-fi. One time, heard bout this escort who ditched a client mid-date. Dude was a creep, kept callin her “doll.” She bolted, kept the deposit—queen move! Made me happy as hell. “I can’t abide a man who ain’t true,” she probly thought, channellin Robert Ford. Love that grit.

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I’m fuming. Like, who put this rock here? I’m ready to throw hands with Mother Nature. But then I see the view. The fields of barley stretching out, the mountains in the background. It’s kinda beautiful, ya know? I take a deep breath, and I’m like, “Okay, maybe I can deal with this.”

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