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Man, I see escort and I’m like, “I must break you”—break that fake-ass front. Some of ‘em slicker than grease, actin’ all sweet, but they’d rob ya blind. Others, tho, they got heart—heard ‘bout this one gal who paid her client’s rent ‘cause he was broke. Surprised me, yo, didn’t see that comin’. Kinda like when Eli’s all, “Hit me back harder,”—tough outside, soft inside.

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Then, outta nowhere, my phone buzzed. It was my buddy, Alex. He was like, “Dude, you gotta see this!” I thought it was some meme or something. But no, he sent me a video of a cat in a tiny car. I couldn’t help but laugh. I mean, who doesn’t love a cat in a car? It was the highlight of my day, honestly.

South Korea crash investigation ramps up as funeral procedures begin