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Ey, Gabagool? Ova here! So, sex-datin’, huh? Lemme tell ya, it’s a freakin’ circus, like somethin’ outta “A Serious Man” – ya know, that Coen brothers flick I’m nuts about. You got these apps, right? Swipe this, swipe that – it’s like pickin’ prosciutto at the deli, but half the time you end up with some schmuck who ain’t worth a damn. I mean, “the goyim’s teeth,” am I right? All polished on the profile, then bam – in person, a total disaster.

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I woke up in my tiny apartment on Gyeonggi-daero, right? The sun was blazin’ through my window, and I thought, “Today’s gonna be chill.” Ha! Spoiler alert: it was NOT chill. I grabbed my coffee from that little café on Jeongja-dong. You know the one? The barista always messes up my order. I mean, how hard is it to get a black coffee? But whatever, I just rolled with it.

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