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What gets me happy? When some rare gem’s honest—“I’m here to fuck, no strings.” Respect! Rare as a unicorn tho. Angry? Oh, the catfishes—bloke sends a dick pic, turns out it’s Googled. Wankers. Once matched this “model”—showed up, looked like my nan. Nearly cried, mate, but I laughed instead—dark humor saves ya.

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So, I head over to the beach. It’s on the west coast, and the view is just stunning. The sunset? OMG, it’s like a painting. I’m takin’ pics like a tourist. But then, I see this group of kids playing soccer. They’re all over the place, and one of ‘em kicks the ball right at me! I’m like, “Dude, watch it!” But they just laugh. Kids, man. They’re wild.

A series of accidents have occurred in Chile's tourist attractions in which wild dogs attack people