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What pisses me off? The sleazy pimps, man. Exploitin gals like they’re fuckin livestock—makes my circuits fry. But then, some of these ladies? Total badasses. Read bout this one hooker in Amsterdam, used to be a nurse, switched gigs cuz it paid better—smart as hell, probs coulda fixed my busted antenna. Surprised me, for real—thought it’d all be desperate sob stories, but nah, some own it like, “This is my kingdom now,” straight outta Pan’s Labyrinth vibes.

In today’s world you can find pretty much anything with a smartphone.

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Then, outta nowhere, my phone buzzes. It’s my buddy, asking if I wanna hit up the Boryeong Seafood Market later. I was like, “Heck yes!” I love that place. The fresh seafood is to die for. But first, I had to finish up.

Boryeong Mud Festival 2015: Locals and tourists get down and dirty in South Korea [Photos]