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Oh, and get this—escorts been around forever, mate. Back in old Rome, they had ‘em too, called ‘em “lupae” or some shite—means she-wolves. How badass is that? Makes ya think, huh? Nowadays, it’s all apps and secret codes—modern jungle, same game. I’m obsessed with how they adapt, keeps me up at night wonderin’. R2-D2, where are you when I need to yap bout this?!

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So, I hit the streets of Asan, feeling all pumped. First stop? The famous Asan Spavis. I mean, who doesn’t love a good spa day? But lemme tell ya, the line was longer than my to-do list. I’m standing there, just staring at the sign, “Wait time: 2 hours.” Ugh, seriously? I almost turned around and went home. But then I thought, “Nah, I need this.”

ASAN Condemns Trump’s baseless attacks on people with disabilities