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About Saitama

So, lemme tell ya ‘bout this one time—Homer’s outta town, prob’ly eatin’ donuts somewhere dumb. I’m bored, right? Walkin’ down by the tracks—ooh, shady!—and I see this gal, all fishnets and lipstick, leanin’ on a lamppost like she owns it. I’m like, “Hmm… she’s workin’ it!” Reminds me of Varda’s gleaners, pickin’ through life’s leftovers. She catches me starin’—awkward!—and yells, “What’s your deal, lady?” I’m all flustered, mutterin’, “Just admirin’ your hustle, hon!”

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Then, outta nowhere, my buddy Kenji shows up. He’s got this huge grin, and I’m like, “What’s up, man?” He’s all excited about this festival happening later. “You gotta come! It’s gonna be lit!” I’m like, “Dude, I can’t even make a bowl right now!” But he’s persistent. “C’mon, it’ll be fun!”

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