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But when it works? Oh man, I was happy as hell once! Found this chick, real pro, knew her stuff. Felt like I was king of the freakin’ world! Reminded me of that *Brooklyn* line—“You’ll feel so homesick you’ll wanna die!”—‘cept I wasn’t homesick, I was just lovin’ life! She even had this weird tattoo, like a map of Jersey—little known fact, some pros mark their turf that way. Cool, right? Made me think, “Maybe I should get a South Park tat, show ‘em who’s boss!”

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Then, I decide to check out the Tanushimarumachi-toyoki Shrine. It’s so peaceful there. I’m standing in front of the torii gate, and I just feel this wave of calm wash over me. But then, I hear this loud honking. I turn around, and it’s a bunch of cyclists zooming by on the road. Like, chill out, people!