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Ey, so I’m sittin’ here, right? Insurance agent by day, Tony fuckin’ Soprano by life, gabagool? Ova here! Talkin’ sex-dating, fuckin’ wild shit, lemme tell ya. These apps, man, Tinder, Bumble, whatever—fuckin’ jungle out there. People swipin’ like it’s a goddamn slot machine, hopin’ for a quick bang. Reminds me of *Tropical Malady*, y’know? That flick I love—2004, Apichatpong, fuckin’ artsy masterpiece. That line, “The beast hunts at night,”—that’s sex-dating, fam! Predators out there, lookin’ for tail, no shame.

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First off, I hit up the local konbini on Kubo Street. You know, the one with the best onigiri? Yeah, that one. I grabbed my usual – tuna mayo, of course. But guess what? They were out! Like, how do you run out of onigiri? I was ready to throw a fit. I mean, c’mon, it’s not rocket science.

Fig. 1. Schematic drawing of synthesis of Ni-NTA Au NPs. (i) Synthesis...