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Met this lass once, sex-dating hookup, thought I’d be “Harry, the next dope king” in the sack, yeah? Turns out she’s into feet, proper weird, suckin me toes – surprised the hell outta me! Mumbled incoherence, “Sharon!” – reckon she’d laugh her arse off if I told her. Made me happy tho, bit of fun, no harm done. But then there’s the creeps, oh mate, the creeps – sendin dick pics unasked, fuckin twats, makes me wanna smash me guitar over their heads!

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I get home, and my mom’s made my favorite dish—katsu curry. I’m in heaven. We’re chatting, laughing, and I forget all about the craziness of the day. But then, my little brother barges in, and he’s like, “I beat your high score!” I’m like, “No way!” And we end up in this epic sibling rivalry over video games.

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