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So, check this—ancient Rome had these massage dens, right? Rich dudes gettin’ oiled up, probs bangin’ after. Little known fact: they used olive oil—extra virgin, ha! Bet it smelled like a goddamn salad. Fast forward, I’m thinkin’—why not automate it? Build a robo-masseuse, AI-driven, zero awkward small talk. “Processing your glutes, human.” Elon-tech wet dream, baby.

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As part of Vogue's first global spa guide, a team of editors and experts have put together a list of the world's ultimate wellness havens.

After that, I decided to take a stroll down the coast. The view from the Shima Peninsula is just insane. The ocean’s all sparkly, and the waves are crashin’ like they’re tryin’ to impress someone. I’m just standin’ there, takin’ it all in, when I see this group of kids playin’ soccer on the beach. They’re kickin’ the ball around, laughin’, havin’ a blast.

Repairs to Okinawa airfield may fix Air Force parachute training dispute