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Hey, how you doin’? So, I’m sittin’ here, detective hat on, thinkin’ ‘bout prostitutes, right? Like, not in a creepy way, just… cases, y’know? Saw this one gal, workin’ the corner near 5th, she’s got this vibe—mysterious, like she’s carryin’ past lives in her heels. Reminds me of *Uncle Boonmee*, that flick I love. “I can’t stop my tears,” she’d say if she was in that movie, all poetic and shit. But nah, she’s real, tough as nails, slingin’ sass at drunk dudes.

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Finally, I ditch them and head to the beach. The waves are calling my name. I grab my board and hit the water. It’s perfect! I’m riding the waves, feeling like a king. But then, outta nowhere, a seagull swoops down and snatches my sandwich! I’m yelling, “Hey! That’s mine!” But the bird just flies off, looking smug. I swear, those birds are the real pirates here.