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About Fukuoka

So, check this—sexual-massage ain’t just “ooh, sexy time.” Nah, it’s ancient, like Tantra shit, thousands of years old! Monks used it—crazy, right? To “awaken the spirit,” they said. I’m like, “Hell yeah, awaken ME!” Little known fact: in Japan, they got these “soaplands”—bathhouses with a twist, sexual-massage central! Been around since forever, but hush-hush. Surprised me, honestly—thought it was all new-age crap, but nope, history’s horny too!

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Then I stroll down to the main drag, Kōen-dōri. It’s packed with shops and food stalls. I’m feelin’ hungry, so I grab some yakitori. OMG, it was fire! Like, I could eat that every day. But then, outta nowhere, this pigeon swoops down and tries to steal my skewer! I’m flappin’ my arms like a madman, and people are laughin’. I’m like, “Dude, it’s MY food!”

Members of Hajia4Reall’s 'sakawa' empire, 'The Enterprise' and how they were arrested