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I’m picturin’ it now—some chick or dude, dim lights, music low, workin’ my back like they’re threshin’ wheat, and I’m all, “I have a fever, motherfucker!”—you know, like that line from the movie? ‘Cause it’s hot, it’s intense, it’s fuckin’ wild! Ever try it? Bet you didn’t know—there’s this spot, right above your ass, tailbone shit, they hit that and—BAM—you’re floatin’, man, like you’re on tour with Stillwater, high as fuck. Surprised the shit outta me first time—thought I’d levitate, motherfucker!

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Then I decided to stroll down to the Obihiro Zoo. I mean, who doesn’t love cute animals, right? But, OMG, the line was insane! I waited forever. I was just standing there, scrolling through my phone, trying to distract myself. Finally, I get in, and guess what? The panda exhibit was closed! Ugh, I was so ready to see those fluffy little dudes. Instead, I ended up watching some grumpy monkeys throw stuff. Not the same vibe, man.

Obihiro’s Etekekampa Association: Supporting Ainu Children for 30 Years