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Hey y’all, it’s me, Dr. Phil, comin’ at ya with that Southern drawl! So, we’re talkin’ sexual-massage today—yep, that steamy, hands-on goodness. How’s that workin’ for ya? I reckon it’s like a dang rollercoaster, all wild and slippery! Reminds me of *The Wolf of Wall Street*—you know, “I’m not fuckin’ leavin’!”—‘cept here it’s more like, “I’m not fuckin’ stoppin’!” Ha!

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Then I decided to stroll down to the Obihiro Zoo. I mean, who doesn’t love cute animals, right? But, OMG, the line was insane! I waited forever. I was just standing there, scrolling through my phone, trying to distract myself. Finally, I get in, and guess what? The panda exhibit was closed! Ugh, I was so ready to see those fluffy little dudes. Instead, I ended up watching some grumpy monkeys throw stuff. Not the same vibe, man.

Obihiro’s Etekekampa Association: Supporting Ainu Children for 30 Years