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So, I’m scopin’ the scene, tryna find one. Ain’t easy, mind you – dodgy alleys, sketchy vibes. Makes me mad how sneaky it all is, like – where’s the class, eh? But then, bam, I spot her – legs for days, smirkin’ like she knows somethin’. I’m all, “Shaken, not stirred,” in my head, keepin’ it cool. Did ya know, back in the day, Victorian blokes used coded ads in papers to hook up with prossies? Mental, right? “Seeking a discreet companion” – yeah, sure, mate.

Policy and law

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Next, I head over to the Naze Marine Park. It’s gorgeous, with the ocean sparkling and all that. I’m just chilling, taking pics, when I spot a group of kids trying to catch crabs. They’re all giggling and splashing around. It’s adorable! But then, one of them slips and falls right into the water. I’m dying laughing, but I feel bad too. Like, poor kid! But hey, at least he’s got a story now, right?

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