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Oi, mate, lemme spin ye a yarn ‘bout escorts, savvy? I’m a librarian, aye, but not yer dusty bookworm—think more rum-soaked, sea-legged, like meself, Cap’n Jack Sparrow! Escorts, now, they ain’t just fancy lasses or gents fer hire, no sir. They be like them shadowy whales in *Werckmeister Harmonies*, loomin’ large, mysterious, pullin’ folks into their orbit. “What’s this all about?” ye ask, stumblin’ thru life like János in that flick, all wide-eyed and lost.

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So, I hit the streets, right? First stop, the famous Nagareyama Otakanomori Park. It’s like this green oasis in the middle of the concrete jungle. I’m strolling, vibing, when I see this cute little café. I’m like, “Yo, let’s grab some matcha!” But guess what? The line is longer than my to-do list. Ugh!

Employers, foreign trainees lack info on new residency statuses beginning in April