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Sex-datin’s a crapshoot, friendo. Apps got folks actin’ like they’re hot stuff, but half the profiles? Fake as a three-dollar bill! Little known fact—dude in Texas got banned from Tinder fer sendin’ dick pics to 47 gals in one night. 47! That’s commitment—or lunacy, take yer pick. Had me laughin’ so hard I near choked on my pretzel. “What you gonna do with that quarter?” I’d ask, like Llewelyn Moss, if I ever met him.
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First stop? The local konbini on Kōen-dōri. I grabbed a onigiri and a can of iced coffee. Best breakfast ever, right? But then, I spilled coffee all over my shirt. Ugh! I was so mad. Like, why does this always happen to me?
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