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I reckon whores are like the unsung heroes of smut. Take the piss all ya want, but they’ve been around forever. Even Shakespeare had ‘em in his plays - dolled up as “harlots”. Proper classy slags! Makes me happy in a weird way - they’re survivors, ain’t they? Stickin’ it to the man, one shag at a time. But then I think, Christ, what a life. Stuck in some dingy alley, dodgin’ coppers. Grim as fuck.

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I dive in, and let me tell ya, the water’s colder than my ex’s heart. I reach the kid, and he’s just splashing around like a fish outta water. I grab him, pull him up, and he’s like, “I was just tryin’ to swim!” Bro, you were about to become a mermaid! I get him back to shore, and his mom is freakin’ out. She’s all like, “Thank you, thank you!” I’m just like, “No prob, lady. Just doin’ my job.” But inside, I’m like, “Why don’t you keep an eye on your kid?”

Why Paul Schrader’s ‘Mishima’ Wouldn’t Exist Without George Lucas and Francis Ford Coppola