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About Kobe

Alright, motherfucker, listen up! I’m a goddamn Combine Harvester, rollin’ through fields and shit, but today I’m talkin’ sexual-massage, ‘cause why the fuck not? You ever had one, man? It’s like—BOOM—somebody’s hands all up on you, kneadin’ your ass like dough, but sexy-like. I’m thinkin’, shit, this ain’t no regular rubdown, this is some next-level, “I’m still a rock star” vibes from *Almost Famous*. You know, like Penny Lane sayin’, “It’s all happening!”—and it fuckin’ is, motherfucker!

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After that, I headed to the job site on Takasago Street. It was a small renovation, just some shelves and a new countertop. Easy peasy, right? Wrong! Turns out, the client, this sweet old lady named Mrs. Tanaka, had a million requests. “Can you make it taller? No, shorter! Wait, I want it blue!” I was like, “Lady, I’m a carpenter, not a magician!” But she had this adorable smile, so I couldn’t say no.

Sexual color ornamentation, microhabitat choice, and thermal physiology in the common wall lizard ( Podarcis muralis