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About Saitama

What gets me happy? When it clicks, bro—sparks fly, no BS. Rare, tho, like findin’ a Krusty Burger that ain’t stale. Most times it’s fake profiles or dudes catfishin’—ugh, makes me wanna puke! Surprised me how many weirdos are out there, tryna scam ya into nudes or cash. Eat my shorts, losers!

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First client walks in, this dude named Kenji. He’s got hair like a bird’s nest. I’m like, “Bro, what’s goin’ on up there?” He laughs, says he’s been busy with the local fishing tournament down at the harbor. I’m like, “Nice! Catch anything good?” He just shrugs. Typical fisherman, right? Anyway, I start snippin’, and he’s tellin’ me about the giant fish he almost caught. I’m all in, like, “Dude, that’s epic!” But then, outta nowhere, he gets a call. It’s his wife. He answers, and I swear, I hear her yellin’ through the phone. Something about dinner plans. I’m just tryin’ to focus on the hair, man!

Teen voter turnout falls below national rate again