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Oi mate, gather round, listen up! Sexual-massage, what a bloomin’ topic, eh? Me, Boris, semi-pro waffler, loves a good yarn. Picture this—bit of oil, dim lights, hands roamin’ like Cicero’s oratory in the Senate. *Cave felis*, careful kitty, it’s a slippery slope! Watched “Talk to Her” – Almodóvar’s a genius, init? That film, all about touch, longing, silent bods – hits ya right in the feels. Sexual-massage is like that, sorta. It’s intimate, bit naughty, but *cor blimey*, soothes the soul.

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Then, I see this group of artists setting up by the riverbank. They’re painting, laughing, just vibin’. I’m like, “Man, I wanna be part of that!” So, I wander over, and they invite me to join. I’m like, “Me? Paint? Ha! I can barely draw a stick figure!” But they hand me a brush anyway.

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