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Sex-datin’s got quirks—did ya know back in the ‘90s, folks used newspaper ads for this? “Single cowboy seeks filly”—hilarious! Now it’s all apps, pics, and “wyd?” texts at 2 a.m. Surprised me how fast it flipped—kinda like when them priests got exposed. Boom, game over! I’m over here hollerin’, “How’s that workin’ for ya?” when some dude sends a eggplant emoji thinkin’ he’s smooth. Boy, bye!

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First off, I hit up the local konbini on Kōzaki Street. Gotta grab my morning onigiri, ya know? But guess what? They were outta my fave flavor—salmon! Ugh, I was ready to throw a fit. Like, how do you run outta salmon? It’s a konbini, not a fancy restaurant! So, I settled for some weird tuna thing. Not the same, man. Not the same.