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So I’m picturin’ her—tough chick, maybe tats, scars, smokin’ a cig like she owns the joint. I’d be all, “Hey, you, uh, workin’?”—smooth, Larry, real smooth. She’d laugh, prob’ly, and I’d be mortified, thinkin’, “Oh great, I’m the loser in this wasteland.” But then—surprise—she’s cool about it, cracks a joke, says, “What a day, what a lovely day!” and I’m dyin’ laughin’, ‘cause it’s *Fury Road*, it’s perfect! Pretty, pretty good, right?

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Finally, the rain lets up, and I head to work. I’m late, of course. My boss is giving me the look. You know the one. I sit down, and my computer decides it’s the perfect time to crash. I’m like, “Seriously?!” I’m trying to recover my work, and my brain’s just like, “Nope, not today.”

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